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Can you teach submission?

One of the reasons I love twitter is the ability to have conversation with people around the world and get inspired by what others are experiencing and talking about. So when Domina Dynasty posed this question on twitter, I was intrigued… Can you teach someone to be submissive? It’s a really interesting question and like…

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Living in a Post 50 Shades World

In 2011, three unassuming fan fiction books were published, and before long the world had collectively lost its mind.   By 2012, over 20 million copies of the books had been sold and the mainstream world was suddenly aware of kink in a brand new way.  BDSM was being discussed and debated on every morning…

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6 Steps to a More Fulfilling Sex Life

These ideas are meant to be simple(ish) and free (of financial need). But that doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy or that it isn’t going to take any investment. It will be an investment of time, and you may find that doing the simplest thing may be more difficult that you first imagined. But…

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On experts, professionals and players…

Reverend Danny Smite posted this open letter today in response to an interview with professional Humiliatrix Ceara Lynch on The Joe Rogan Experience podcast. Here are my thoughts…. Not everyone who does kink professionally feels connected to the activities on a personal level and that’s ok. I don’t think Ceara has ever identified herself as…

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Enough To Make You Blush: Exploring Erotic Humiliation – Available for sale!

Enough To Make You Blush: Exploring Erotic Humiliation is ready and available for sale! I am so proud of this book and I hope you enjoy it. Inside it you’ll find: The difference between embarrassment, humiliation & degradation Why kinksters enjoy consensual psychological torment Tips for communicating your desires for both dominants & submissives The…

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It’s almost ready! – a book about Erotic Humiliation

Writing a book is a really involved project. The seedling of an idea gets planted and then years may go by as you think, collect notes and brainstorm ideas to share. In my case, nearly 10 years have gone by as I’ve presented this topic dozens of times at different kink events across the country.…

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A few kinky shopping tips!

Q: I’m just starting to explore my kinks & fetishes, what should I purchase before I really know what I like? A: Start with the ‘vanilla’ items that resemble kink items such as a wooden spoon for a paddle, scarves or neckties for bondage (be sure to keep safety scissors handy to cut them off…

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5 Tips For New Submissives

If you’re starting to explore your submissive side or starting to experiment with dominance & submission in the bedroom, then there are few things that are important to keep in mind. Regardless of what any erotica or fantasy books & movies might show, there is no “one” right way to be submissive. But there are…

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Bawdy Storytelling – The Defiant Balloons

I tell stories a lot. Some of my friends lovingly call it “The Kali Show” (well, at least they mostly say it lovingly!) When I meet new people, or am hanging out with friends or am teaching classes…there’s always a story to tell. I like my stories to entertain and inform and since my life…

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The progression of a professional pervert….

I’ve always been rather sexually adventurous, so when many people ask me out I got into this profession I explain that it was a rather simple stepping stone process. I remember when I first started stripping and I found it to be empowering rather than degrading. My self-confidence grew, my assertiveness grew stronger and I…

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