Teaching Kink is like a Soulgasm

  Teaching kink is totally my high. When I get up in front of a class to present my thoughts and experiences with perversion, I get in a totally euphoric state. After teaching for so many years I’ve thought a lot about why that is, and why it is so thoroughly awesome. Growing up, it…

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What is the difference between a fetish and a fantasy?

The term “fetish” is used pretty loosely these days to mean anything that really really turns someone on. But there is an official definition, and here it is… From Wikipedia.com “Sexual fetishism, or erotic fetishism, is the sexual arousal a person receives from a physical object, or from a specific situation” So when the term…

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Kinky Polyamory

  A while back I did an interview with Cunning Minx for her podcast Poly Weekly and we talked about being poly AND kinky. I shared my experience of having multiple submissives for many years and that even though we didn’t have a traditionally “sexual” relationship I still identified (and still do) as poly because…

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Keeping Your Kinky Connection, Even With a Busy Schedule

  Many couples that enjoy kinky sex and/ or relationship structures feel that it’s important for BDSM to not be just something that is done in the bedroom but rather as a way to live life. For others kinky sex is something fun to explore but only in the bedroom. Regardless, keeping kink in your…

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So your guy is a foot fetishist…what now?

  So your guy is a foot fetishist…what now? I have to admit that foot fetishism has a special place in my heart, it was my first introduction into the BDSM world and it suddenly explained my own deeply felt response to wearing an amazing pair of shoes or seeing my toes look perfectly pedicured.…

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What has #BeingKinky done for you?

  I have a love/hate relationship with Twitter, but one thing I do love about it is the kind of ‘crowd-source’ responses that can come through if a question is posed. One night I was thinking about all the amazing things being kinky (both personally and professionally) has done for me and wondered what other…

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What’s your name? Using Pseudonyms in The Scene

“I’d like to introduce you to Lady-Mistress Catwhiskers, Supreme Being of the Universe.” “Hello there, I’m Frank.” “Greetings, I am Lord Knockerlots and this is My property, slut zisc.” These are examples of how people might introduce themselves in the Scene, examples of the wide variety of ways that kinksters identify. Names and titles have…

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“Why Kink?”

  “Why Kink?” I hear this question from a wide variety of people. After we’ve discussed what I do for a living, there is an inevitable pause, and the “But why would someone want to be kinky?” There are so many answers to that question that I thought it would be perfect to list a…

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Don’t judge a Book by it’s Cover

There have been many occasions that people have shown surprise when they find out I am a professional dominatrix. “But you seem so nice!” they say, or “I couldn’t imagine you being that mean, you’re so happy.” These statements always make me laugh, and gives me an opportunity to explain that there are many ways…

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